Well last night I successfully completed one day from sun up to sun down at least time wise. I did however question my productivity through the day with my fasting and also my devotional time not being increased through the day of fasting. During my moment of weakness and craving I did dry out to the Lord and prayed for strength to continue out in obedience, but i still feel like i have room to grow in the area of fasting for a better relationship with Christ. I can't help but think about my weight and how it will affect me that way. I also can't stop thinking about the hunger and about the headaches and nausea when it happens, but I want to tap into the truly spiritual purpose of fasting.
It was revealed to me that I eat out of a nervous habit. After my fast was broken I had a well balanced dinner, and I was not fat full but surely satisfied. During the election process I started to snack incessantly throughout the election watch. I even said to my mother, "just let me snack." The sin was already committed.
This morning I did not start with my devotional, I had a heart felt talk with a friend and an accountability session with my partner in this Quiana. I will do my devotional in a minute and report back with my consecration journey. I did however reveal that I have a hard time separating my purpose for this all, is it for the sake of discipline to make God look good through my life, or is it because im insecure about my body. So today my focus will be on my own dealings with being ok with my self image, and making sure all decisions are for the love of God.
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